Tea: Scientifically proven to be better
than sliced bread!
It’s the sensational news we all knew already! Finally, again, scientists
have proved that tea is, err, good for you.
Above: Monkeys have been drinking tea
to relieve stress since the eighties.
In the second recent study made by these science types, (obviously their
research ideals are influenced in no small part by a nice cuppa) it has been
proven that a chemical response occurs in the body that makes a brew relieve
stress. It is argued that the drinking of tea is not only
psychologically good in relieving stress,
it is also scientific. Though the study, as detailed in the
Daily Telegraph, fails to identify the exact chemical reason why this
is, they have managed to at least ascertain that it is good for relieving
stress.
As is coming up with at least some sort of a conclusion after an
expensive scientific study, one might
imagine.
What anyone knows who enjoys a good cup of tea, be it slumped over in a
comfy chair with the box on, or during a temporary respite from dull working
ignominy, or wherever, is that a tea break really can be the very definition
of relaxation. This we already know. But why? Why indeed!
The human subjects in the experiment were subjected to a six week course of
real tea, while the other half were mercilessly fed fake tea, a so called
placebo brew up, which was apparently tea flavoured, but not actually tea
(huh?). Half of the participants were unaware of the fact they were not
getting their regular dosage of tea, which scientists found resulted in
higher stress levels. Also, the folks in the study were subjected,
apparently, to “stressful situations,” such as "[the threat of]
unemployment, being accused of shop lifting
or being involved in an untoward incident at a nursing home".
No,
we're not sure what sort of "untoward incident"
in a nursing home would cause stress either.
Arguably, this meddling with people’s minds is perhaps slightly unethical,
especially as PG Tips commissioned similar research in the 1980’s using
humanised monkeys as subjects. The trained monkeys, who wore people clothes
and drank tea out of expensive looking china teacups, are famous as being
the public face of the company during this time period. Anyone who remembers
these hilariously jovial glimpses at the human-like
monkeys living a normal domesticated life will doubtlessly relate
to the happy-go-lucky nature of the primates exchanging pleasantries with
each other (though whether they knew what they’d obviously been trained to
say, or whether the were merely replicating sounds is another matter
entirely). In short, these monkeys were clearly in a relaxed state,
presumably due to the effects of drinking PG Tips.
Animal experimentation conducted in the eighties proved what the scientists
conclude in 2006.
That’s that well and truly sorted then. Until the
next “groundbreaking” tea health study…
I wonder if they got to keep the clothes?